Friday, October 22, 2010

Humor Chic - Decalogue to become a beautiful skeleton victim - Victoria Beckam, I Love Anorexia

Want to become a perfect Skeleton fashion victim but you don’t know how?
Is your daily life boring and you feel the urge to make a change and shed all those extra pounds?
Never despair, Humor Chic loves you and is thinking of you. Carefully follow the decalogue to become a real skeleton victim:

1- Install an illustration from the Humor Chic I Love Anorexia series by aleXsandro Palombo as the screensaver of your desktop, cell phone, facebook or twitter page

2- Carefully check the life lessons of your favorite skeleton stars, Rachel Zoe and Victoria Beckham

3- Every day just eat a nice apple for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Make sure it’s always a glamorous red one, it gives the idea of substance

4- Give up screwing, real fashion victims never do it

5- Don’t dress up: cross-dress as if you were working at the circus or like a hooker or even better a true Brazilian transvestite... devastate your face with Botox and fool yourself you’re the new Lady Gaga. Believe me, it works!

6- Surround yourself with all gay friends and convince yourself the fashion is made up of nothing but gays. That’ll give you a real explanation for why men are not making advances to you

7- Fake lots of smiles at people who keep looking at you pitifully. Take a deep breath, you’re not ridiculous, you’re not a toad... it's just envy

8- Always repeat aloud: "I’m a fashion icon", even though no one ever thinks so and everyone will think you're a poor demented creature

9- Do a lot of yoga, it’s a great way to forget you’re hungry

10- Don’t drink water, an apple contains enough liquid. Replace it with champagne and lots of coke

11- Hang around outside fashion shows, and let all the street bloggers shoot off their flashes at you. You can imagine you’re Nicole Kidman at the Oscars and they’ll be your launch pad into the world of antimatter

12- Add a Humor Chic I Love Anorexia T-shirt by aleXsandro Palombo to your wardrobe and mix it arrogantly with glam pieces from Balenciaga, Balmain, theatrical costumes, wigs and whatever other crap you’ve got... and twitter all you can, I’m crazy!

Are you there? Are you sure? Greetings my love! Welcome to the world of idiocy and anorexia...
we adore you!

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